Snape's biggest fan (awallens) wrote in a_writers_life,
Snape's biggest fan
awallens
a_writers_life

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I love HP and my all time favorite character is Snape... Angsty, sarcastic, bitter, what's not to love?
So I present...

I watched my daughter sleep. The shock and grief I felt was a constant weight on my chest. For a daughter who was not wanted at first, I lover her like she was a part of my soul. Questions kept flashing through my mind though. How would she ever perform magic? How could My Lord do this to her? In my heart of hearts, I knew why my Lord did this to my daughter. He coveted my devotion for himself, and when she came along, I was devoted to another. She was six months old and was the light of my life. Many people would be surprised to see me, Severus Snape holding a baby, cooing to her and tickling her, revelling in her spontaneous laughter. When her mother first told me she was pregnant, it's safe to say I went completely crazy. I yelled at her, asking her how she dared get pregnant. How in the hell was I going to take care of her and a new baby? How dare she burden me with this responsibility? I chafed against the life I was forced into. We wed five months into her pregnancy. People didn't try to act like it was a happy affair. If her family had not been so insistent, I would not have married her. Her family was very well-known in the wizarding community. Her father was one of the most respected wizzards of all time. Of course, my Lord also explained why I should marry her, and that's what convinced me.
"It's a great way to get information for us, Severus," he hissed over my meager protests.
I finally relented and we married, and four months later, my daughter was born. For days, we debated on a name for her. We finally decided to name her Narcissa. I was close with Lucius and Narcissa Malfoy at the time and what a touching tribute to her Auntie Narcissa. Everyone in my inner circle doted on the girl, not just me. Bella and Rodolphus Lestrange would come over for drinks and they would play with her for hours. Everybody thought Bella was a cold bitch, and she sure could be. I had seen her practice the unforgivable curses dozens of times and smile with glee when she did it. When she held Cissa though, one could almost see what a mother she would have been. Even Rabastan, Rodolphus's younger brother, would stare at her with wonder. That's why My Lord did what he did. I would never forget the night he came to my house. It was a cold night in February, and his voice was as cold as the wind outside. He explained to me that I had to be punished for my lack of devotion to his cause. He said I would have to be punished. He grabbed Baby Cissa from me and muttered a spell that I will never forget.
"Persiana!" he hissed.
Cissa stiffened in his arms, then she started before letting out an ear-ringing scream of agony and taking her tiny hands and covering her eyes.
"My God, My Lord, what, what did you do to her?" I whispered, taking a step back.
"There, now your daughter will never see your face again. I have blinded her and maybe that will quell your devotion to her!" he said with a chuckle before he shoved the screaming baby at me and disapparated. I stood with the screaming baby in my arms, too shocked to move. My daughter, my perfectly healthy daughter was blind.
Over the next few days, Cissa cried constantly. We took her to St. Mungos, but there was nothing we could do. Her mother was beyond consolation and closed herself off from the world. I tried to talk to her, and her father tried to talk to her, but there was no luck. We tried to instill some hope in her, even if we had no answers ourselves. However, she was having nothing of it. She wouldn't hold the baby, wouldn't look at her. She ignored Cissa's cries, and would sit for hours, staring at nothing.
Then of course, after the shock subsided a bit, more practical questions asulted her grandfather and I. Her mother wasn't able to think properly at the time, so all the worrying for my child fell on me. How would she cast spells, if she could not see to point a wand? Everyone knew that one had to see to be able to point a wand and cast a spell. How could she brew a potion without being able to measure ingredience? She would never learn the craft I had grown to love so dearly. How would she defend herself from wizzards who wanted to kill her? I associated with some bad wizzards at the time, and I didn't want her to end up like me. I wanted her to be a good witch, not like her namesake. Although truthfuly, Narcissa would have been OK had she not married Lucius, but that was the past now. They had a little boy, Draco, and he and Narcissa got along beautifully.
One night, I was sitting in front of the fire, brooding. As I stared into the fire, I sensed a disturbance, and a few seconds later, Albus Dumbledore unfolded his long frame and landed gracefully in my fireplace. He caught me gaping, and greeted me.
"I would like to talk to you and my daughter please. Where is she?"
"In the bedroom, I'll go get her, Professor."
"Oh Severus, we've been father-in-law and son-in-law for a while now. Surely you can call me by my first name?"
"I'll try Sir," I said as I stood up and moved towards the bedroom.
I opened the door and called to my wife. There was no answer. I approached the bed and leaned over. That's when I saw the note and saw my wife's skin. It was pale and waxy. I leaned over and shook her. There was no response. I shook her harder, but she still didn't move.
"Albus, come here now!" I screamed.
I heard him run into the room behind me.
"Oh dear God," he breathed.
"She's not dead, is she?"
"I... I think so."
That's when we saw the wand lying beside her. Dumbledore picked it up and performed the spell which would tell him which spell the wand had performed last.
"Avada Cadavra," he murmured.
"I didn't know you could kill yourself with a wand," I whispered.
The next few years dragged by. My daughter and I moved on with life the best way we knew how. I was teaching her how to make potions, and Dumbledore said she was a perfect candidate for wandless magic. I wasn't feeling quite so hopeless about her blindness anymore. She was proving every day she was just a normal kid. A normal kid with no mother and me, trying to do the best I could in an uncertain world.
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